Geometric Giggler Gifts

"This is an octagon after cutbacks."

Shape Battle

Clown God

That's all very well sir, but is it full strength, low fat, high calcium or soy?

Tesseract of the D'Urbervilles.

Get on with it!

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

'Maybe a firewall isn't enough to protect our computer from worms and viruses. That's why I additionally installed this fence!'

Fancy a pint?

'I'll come in as soon as I've seen the orbits of Venus.'

The spirit in the wall would go on and ond, but Alvin never let it bother him.

Fig 1. Fig 2. Fig Newton.

Solar Gain: "Be honest: does the new planet make me look fat?"

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

'He's wearing a toupee.'

Nethead strip: Speak binary

William, have I ever told you you're the wings beneath my wind?

"Can you write 'To Mandy - you're the best'?"

'I'm sorry for laughing Emperor Dorkbutt, it's just that in our language, well...'

"I'm the black sheep of the family because I'm afraid of the dark."

'U. . .S. .U. .C. .K. . . . L. . O. . L.'

'In this...um...part of the circle...'

Black Hole Corks

"It's a smart toaster. If you can't figure it out, press the 'Dumb It Down' button."

'That was so funny. I haven't booed that loudly in years.'

"I can't create your bride until you make your co-pay."

'You Have a food allergy. Even worse it's to 'O' type!'

Aliens would have destroyed us years ago if it weren't for our entertainment value.

'Why are ghosts bad at telling lies?'

'Millions of billions of trillions of light years away? I could visualise it if you said it in MILES!'

'But seriously , folks, I know you're out there, I can hear you bleeding!'

"Oh, oh - looks like a blue shift."

'Whoops!'

We interrupt today's "The Price is Right" episode to bring you breaking news … Weeks ago, the Hubble telescope spotted a rogue planet the size of Venus plummeting through the solar system on a collision course with earth. It turns out it was actually just a prank involving two very bored ISS astronauts and a grapefruit. Breaking News!!!!! Maybe we should send them to Mars after all. One of them seems to have scrawled "Around and around and around and around" all over his space suit, in crayon.