Geography Jokers Gifts

'If Aunt Arctica is on the bottom of the world, does that mean Uncle Artica is on top of the world?'

"Just for fun today we could fire some eggs around."

"Don't forget the nucleus has mass."

'I just evolved the opposable thumb, and I've already got carpal-tunnel syndrome!'

People bell ringing - 'RING TONES'

"You're on mute."

Elephant and Castle

Megacorp Pictures Advertising Dept. We need a catchy phrase to promote this new earthquake movie. "Look out for that runaway terrain."

'That's nothing I am one million years old and if I had their kind of money I would be a boulder in my own Canyon.'

'Looks like the deer are moving out of these woods.'

"Turns out the mouth of a river isn't the part right under its nose."

Old Geezers Erupting Every Hour on the Hour.

"The big boot Italy ain't gonna kick the small shoe Sicily no more, capiche?"

Relativity explained; the woman on the train will always appear more attractive than the woman on the platform.

'Why are you watching TV with the lights off?'

2 trilobites; 'So what are you going to be when you die - oil or gas?'

A man squashed by a giant leaf

Australia. I wonder if political spokesmen in the southern hemisphere spin the news in the opposite direction.

'When I asked for funding of my rooster egg laying research, I was told the chick is in the male.'

Old Faithful and Old Unfaithful

"The bad news is climate change is for real. The good news is it will make the liberal left extinct by 2050."

At next mogul, carve left. At next mogul, carve right. Recalculating.

One of Indonesia's most feared Volcanoes: The mighty 'Kraka-toe-a'.

Our Planet

"There's a fly in my soup."

'She's no ladybird Stan...' - Ladybird says 'bum...bottom.'

Cut down your own tree.

Mathematics.

'Are you paying attention Eurasia?' 'Sorry, I was drifting.'

Earthquake Research Society. The meeting's over already? Yep --- it was called to order at 8:00 and adjourned at 8:02 by a motion from the floor.

The Broken Clock That Is Wrong Twice A Day

"Have you ever wondered if there's more to life than this..?"

'Liberia? I thought you told me to register her in Siberia.'

Bull in field lurking behind tree waiting to ambush ramblers.

'Was it windy last night...?'