Geo Explorer Gifts

The Monitor is going to sleep.

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

"Where else in the world would you get such wonderful sunsets?"

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

Another long day down at the Bureau of Earthquake Prediction.

"I was young and cocky because I wasn't aware of my shortcomings. Now I'm old and cocky because I can't remember what they are."

'Humans are so considerate: They put perches like these for us on every one of their houses...'

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

When Dinosaurs ruled the Earth.

* Let's stop here, they seem nice!

Second lifeReal life.

"Even though I wasn't always perfect, I feel deep down that I am now."

"I always forget how much louder they sound in the country."

Big Shot/Bigger Shot.

"Tell me what you think of the menu. I wrote it."

'We have to go global since nobody around here will buy our product.'

'I'm studying the lay of the land..'

"We should get out to the country more often."

"They were built during a pandemic."

'No, no, no. You guys are way off! This isn't even the cat. You guys are on the dog.'

Since we've remodeled, you are no longer here.

'You certainly lived a remarkable life. Any chance you'll get over yourself?'

Narcissist in the tunnel of love.

As soon as I've extinguished my ego, I'm going to take some "me" time.

"He knows 'sit, stay, paw' and 'upstate.'"

'The first rule of enjoying fine wine is to make sure you and the wine are in the same room.'

These upside-down tomato planters simplify everything. But, dad. Mother nature wants plants to grow upwards. Sez who?

Feedback should be sought for genuine reasons, not because you want compliments. . .

"Frankly, I just want to talk about how great I am non-stop and uninterrupted for 50 minutes every week on a long term basis."

"I think I deserve more than a stub on Wikipedia."

Crossing Borders

Tell me the truth. Do you think my signature is logo-esque?

As Seen On TV

'So, when did you first realise that you fancied me rotten?'

'I'm a narcissist? - Are you saying I'm not perfect?'