Generational Wealth Pillows

"Of course you can have some help from the bank of mum and dad, just as soon as we've had a word with the bank of grandma and grandad."

"Right now, grandmom's bark is definitely worse than her bite!"

"Nice haircut."

"Grandpa, how did you ever survive without apps?"

How Grandma Sees the Remote

'Beware of the teenager.'

"1972: Kim and Doug invited us to their key party... Sounds groovy! 2017: We just got an evite from Kim and Doug to join them on an ayahuasca retreat in Peru... Tommy starts hockey and my father is about to die—no way."

"We added it just for the millenials."

"Date of birth?" "1989." "In 1989 I couldn't make ice... still can't." "Good lord, she could be my daughter! I'm so #!@* old." "That's the year my wife left me. Now I have a cold and I'm depressed!"

"How come they remember every word of any pop song but not a single line of poetry?"

"Gramps, you were alive before everyone knew what you were doing on social media... What was that called?" "Bliss!"

Fred Philpot, Born 1944.

"Generation X, Y or Z? No idea. My brat is Generation SLSLWMAF - Stinkin' Lazy, Still Living with Mom at Forty."

Millennials in the Year 2050...

"It's called a mobile... but I've been here an hour and have yet to see it move."

'...and so begins the generation gap.'

The Ageing Process.

"Someday when you have children of your own, you’ll understand why I dress you like ‘an idiot.’"

"Thank you for your service."

"It's the Silicon Valley foundation - they want to know if we'll match our grandson's $100 million donation."

"Google says it's some form of ancient timing device."

"It's a cereal box. It's not supposed to be interactive!"

"I'm glad you boys let me come along with you...it's nice to see how you kids live life! I mean, with youth on your side, I'm sure you live every moment to the fullest!"

"Dad, how does the outdoors work without batteries?"

"How long do you think it'll take before he realizes I took his phone away?"

"My Dad keeps playing the awful originals to my remixes."

"Too bad we only see each other when we're hungry! I know! Let's go on a date, a real date!"

"Enough with the hard-luck stories about spanking and cursive and appointment television, Dad."

'Well, I find it intimidating. I mean, any minute they could fall down completely!'

"No, grandpa...LGBT is not some new kind of bacon, lettuce and tomato snadwich."