Generational Commentary Gifts

JFK RIP

"I can't stand Generation ZX-3452. Those entitled brats have no idea how hard we had it growing up."

"Nice haircut."

Little boy reading a classic whilst his Dad reads a comic.

"1971... 2015..."

"We're neither software nor hardware. We're your parents."

"Hey! I was trained in 1948 and was good enough for then, so it's good enough for now....whipper-snapper!"

Dear Sadie, I'm just an aging Baby-Boomer who still believes in America, and sees all the good around me, but I don't understand why we've become so mean. How can I feel good about us again? Signed, Marlemarion. Great question. There's an easy answer as to how you can feel better about the world. Change your name to something normal! I just don't agree with the @#$% premise that we've gotten mean.

"One day, son, all this anxiety will be yours."

"That's right, son. God knew everything before Google."

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, What do you think of younger men? -kl. *(Actual reader letter) Ask Sadie at rudy@rudypark.com. Depends. Younger men have strong jaws and rock-hard abs, but they're missing the sexiest thing: they're not crotchety jerks, set in their ways, willing to argue about anything and say totally stupid things. Hey, doesn't that foul old wretch realize I've got rock-hard abs and a steel jaw?! (This cartoon was originally published on 2014-07-12)

In the Year 2525

'He was an impressionist. Like that Alistair McGowan...'

"I'm glad you boys let me come along with you...it's nice to see how you kids live life! I mean, with youth on your side, I'm sure you live every moment to the fullest!"

"Greatest Band?"

"Mom, does granddad want me to run away? He's playing that Disco music again!"

"The floor is now open for discussion of what to name ou generation."

High pants/Low pants.

"Things were really different when I was growing up. Childhoods today are much longer."

"How did people waste time before computers?"

"This is my mom's phone. Instead of a hashtag, it has a pound sign."

"Ha! This younger is so absorbed in social media that he cannot appreciate his youth, unlike I, aging millennial, who cannot appreciate his thirties."

'That's the trouble with the older generation...they're too intolerant.'

"Too bad we only see each other when we're hungry! I know! Let's go on a date, a real date!"

Contest time. Mort and Sadie, our ornery octogenarians, have decided to rename Rudy's generation. Mort favors Generation I - for impatient. Sadie prefers Generation V - for virtual. Or vapid! What do you think? Please send your own ideas to asksadieshow@gmail.com. C'mon people, get thinkin'!

"My Dad keeps playing the awful originals to my remixes."

"I can't image growing up without computers or cell phones. Your generation had it rough, huh, Dad?"

"I'm going to e-mail you this op-ed about how your generation is ruining everything."

"My dad says at some point in your life, fashion isn't important anymore. You basically wear nylon slacks and guayaberas every day."

I found the most amazing Youtube show. It's about an angel who helps people. Oh yeah? Yeah. And he drives around with some burly guy with a big beard. They wear '80s clothes and don't have any special effects. It's a perfect period show. Wait … are you talking about "Highway to Heaven"? That's not a period show, that was made in the '80s. Even you have to know that. Thanks for ruining it for me.

"So, when you young execs talk about 'phoning it in' there's no actual phone involved?"

"Look, I'm really having trouble with my computer. I need it to work and I need it now...and your fancy schmancy jargon isn't helping much."

Bah, when I was your age, I had to walk five miles through the snow just to ... to ... Well, just to walk five miles through the snow, I guess.

"I invited my friends over so we can see how much your generation is leaving us to pay off!"

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, My mother doesn't want me to get a tattoo, but I disagree. I believe that a tattoo would be very attractive. What do you think? - Jessica, rebellious daughter. *(Actual reader letter). Is this serious? Is this a real letter? They're all real. I am stunned. Stunned? What is wrong with children? Defying their mothers? Do you know what would happen if we had defied our parents like that? What? They'd have sent us to live in the old country with our illiterate cousins who left