Generation Gap Analyst Gifts

'...need to design something to bridge the generation gap.'

"Google says it's some form of ancient timing device."

"Leon, you are a millennial Odyssey."

"Everyone forgets: Before we were old white men, we were young white men."

'I know you want me to have all the things you never had as a kid, but I'd rather have the things I want.'

"Dad, how can you say this shirt is 'cool'? It's not! The concept of 'cool' has been repeatedly bought by corporate marketers and sold back to us until it's meaningless!"

"Seriously! My mother says she remembers when all you could do with a cell phone was make calls."

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

Super-Papi moves swiftly to defeat the evil Electronico!

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"Whoa. Someone needs their diaper changed."

"Tell me again, Grandpa, about how you let your freak flag fly."

'I'm doing a school report on 'the aging process,' Dad -- can I interview you?'

'We'll never understand these kids. It's the old evolution gap.'

'You're so nice and friendly that I've got nothing to moan about. That's a bit of cheek!'

"I think my parents are pretty old. They remember a time before 'clumping' cat litter."

'I'm going to bed...whatever...'

"We added it just for the millenials."

"When I was your age, all we had to know was how to wind."

"Remember the days we could drink and party all night and we thought guys in their 50's were old geezers?"

"Don't worry, I won't hold my age against you."

Low standard of living

"How come they remember every word of any pop song but not a single line of poetry?"

"I dooon't know this sooonngg. I'm just heeeere with my daaaaaughter and her frieeeends."

"Elon Musk just earned more than I'll ever earn in my whole life in the time it took me to say Elon Musk."

'Unfortunately our definition of 'job' differs.'

"I'm your hip replacement."

"We invented your hair."

"He likes spending time with his grandpa. Thanks to poor diet and little exercise, they share many of the same health issues."

"A raise?! In my day, if we needed more money, we just borrowed it."

"Never ask Dad about technology. He thinks a semiconductor is someone who leads the Boston Pops for half a year."

'They're not reliable.'

"Grandpa, what was it like living off the grid for most of your life?"

"I'm working on texting my memoirs."