Gender Gagster Pillows

'Because only men can believe than 1 inch equals a mile.'

'No swimming. No breathing.'

Snowprov

'Colin's dying to show you how his renewable energy scheme works.'

Man see a sign on door of Clayton's Jokes & Gags Shopee - 'Please Use Second Door To The Right'

'It's a farton, fartoff lamp!'

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

'Tell your mom you coughed it up and you're guaranteed a day off from school.'

Good Dentist ~ Bad Dentist

The GODFATHER Ride 25¢

'Meaning of life? You bet! Here, pull my finger.'

Mobsters at the Beach

"One more question, Mr Cake. How do you feel about wearing a sheet, creeping about people's bedrooms and saying 'woo'?"

'This is a personal insult to me and my family. Paulie, word is you regifted that horse's head I gave you last month. . .'

Comedy School: 'Please knocky nicky nooo!'

"Daddy, can I have a pony killed?"

'I haven't had the urge for a cigarette for two days. How's the patch working for you?'

"Because it's got a goddam crack in it, that's why."

Egypt 1896. Dr Howard Prendergast and Percy Smythe discover the tomb of King Ahktuman the Practical Joker, proving conclusively that the ancient Egyptians were the first culture to use whoopee cushion.

"Did you remember to whack the cat?"

'...and don't think I didn't see that flying tackle.'

Parachuting with Concrete Shoes

"Yikes! Okay, I'm going to pretend I didn't see this."

'You've not been involved with money laundering before have you Joe!'

'Congratulations - you're the first victim of recombinant DNA.'

Why did the chicken cross the mafia

The monster was surprised to receive a medical bill from Dr. Frankenstein.

"Let me guess...you forgot to put their hand-brakes on!"

'Before you buy the gun can I ask if you thought about taking your cat to the vets first?'

"Your resume indicates a fair bit of experience in the field of problem solving."

"Whack him. And if you can't whack him, redact him."