Gastronomy Explorer T-Shirts

'At prices like this I bet you don't get many customers in here.' - 'At prices like this we don't need many.'

Motorcyclist.

"I'd recommend getting blind drunk. The food here's awful."

'Tonight's special is out of this world. Have your passports ready.'

French Street.

'It would be nice to eat somewhere that doesn't have a grumpy chef.'

'Enjoy the meal?.' 'I get more nourishment biting my lip.'

'I need to lose enough pounds to take a thirty-five meal cruise!'

'I'm filling in for the sommelier. We have a fine shiraz today for only $39. It's 14.7 alcohol, a Class 1B flammable, so if I see you consume it near an open flame, I'll have to cite you.'

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

Come dine with me!

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

La Table

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

'Like death by salad.'

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

Try to guess the continent dining...

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

"...But ASIDE from that, how was your trip to France?"

'Strained carrots again! What am I being punished for this time?'

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

'Burl says it only works with corn though if you want to try it.'

Before/After

French wine

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."