Garden Comedy Fan Gifts

Give Chlorophyll.

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

An Unexpected Guest.

'Ugh Look The whole garden is just one giant cat toilet'

"When will somebody cut the grass?"

'It says right here on the package, Ed, 'avoid any direct contact with skin'!'

"There's got to be a better way to raise potatoes!"

'You certainly went to town growing all that lettuce so I've dressed for dinner.'

Flamingo on a bird table feeding from a shrimp container.

'These spare Christmas decorations make perfect bird scarers.'

Spiro & Pusho: watering the vine and the neighbour.

'Um. . . I don't think that's a candy bar.'

Annual flower having a mid-life crisis in July

Paving over the window-box

'I'd invite you in but there's no room.'

Bird feeder being used by vultures.

Man is injured transporting cacti.

Bird baths with two different kinds of water - sparkling and still.

"Must've planted those seeds upside down..."

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

'I ask you, Larry the Landscaper, did you ever, under any circumstances, promise anyone a rose garden?'

'It's only a slug Norman.'

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.

'We want the garden to be stamped with my husband's personality.'

God builds the first lawn mower.

'What if your tree grows, Burl? Won't it choke to death?'

A flower beats up another flower - Genetically Engineered plants tend to be more aggressive than naturally grown ones.

'Everybody's entitled to have a hobby. Mine's growing grass.'

Burn All Your Garden Rubbish

"When is it time to stop smelling the roses and suck up the nectar?"

Crazy paving company.

'Look what my son gave me!'

Avoid Constant Borrowing

Square Yard