Garden Architect T-Shirts

"The garden is my résumé."

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

"Well, since his retirement from British Aerospace the only thing he's managed to do is build a bird table

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

Plant Lady

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

'Couldn't you just bring a bucket and spade like other children?'

God's Subcontractors

Building Sandcastles.

"Which of these will look the prettiest without the others?"

Painting taking root...

"Where's all your fish?" "I never should have bought 'coy' fish."

Tree house.

'Looks like Reginald wasn't kidding when he said he's going to start urban farming on the roof...'

Greenfingers.

"This is a side of Manhattan you don't often see."

"You can build it with me, but you can't wreck it with me."

The Garden

Environment Friendly House.

'I want to immortalise the area in a painting before it is changes for ever.' (Artist is scooped up by a digger.)

Woman watering garden with watering can. Bug with umbrella up.

California Gold...field of poppies with matching border

Man looks at huge dinosaur fossil in garden, saying: 'It looks great in the rockery, but don't you think you should call the Natural History Museum?'

'It's hard to believe this is just an atrium.'

Flowers wearing sunglasses.

"I do like a plant that can hold its drink"

'Sophie has discovered Gehry.'

Psychic to Leylandii tree - 'You will reach great heights.'

Setting out the bedding plants was one of his few remaining pleasures,

Dog on balconey in city sniffing tree in pot

Old Joe the gardener was begining to regret the fact he'd bought last year's pumpkin seeds on Halloween!

'I'm concerned that the children may be playing too rough.'

"You do have your own way of enjoying the garden, don't you?"

'I hope it;s an express.'

"Before I start. . . . are you sure pruning doesn't violate the tree's rights?"