Gang Culture Satire Pillows

'I wish you wouldn't carry knives in your trousers - they make such holes in your pockets!'

Politically Correct Snowperson

Volcano Sacrifice Competition

Cheesie Rider

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

'This is a personal insult to me and my family. Paulie, word is you regifted that horse's head I gave you last month. . .'

Attack Of The Guy From The Other Room

"One trip to the dentist and look who's got the attitude!"

"Hey, Gary. Lois wanted to know if you’re up for waiting forever for reheated leftovers and sipping warm mimosas intended to ease the pain of poor service amid a cacophony of idiot tourists and 20-year-olds... you know, brunch."

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

'OK, Now let's see your Downward Dog'.'

'Plastic surgeon' - 'Gift a give certificate to your ugly friends'

"If that's the chief medical officer I'm not here."

'Hey, man, that's not how we do the flash mob!'

"The president has banned the Mexican wave and replaced it with the American wave... Also, empanadas will now only use American jumping-beans."

"Our view is if it isn't made in a factory, it's organic."

"As this is our first date, perhaps I should tell you that I participate in several frequent liar programmes."

'Thursday is out - I got my anger-management class.'

"Nobody wants to hang out with Bedbug Man."

"That's very deep house."

Dating Agency with Best Before Dates.

Biclops: "...and then I was outed in '84 and force to admit I liked the men as well as the ladies."

"Keep pushing - I can see the baby's head!"

Big car with machine gun poking through window, bumper sticker reads: Yardie on board.

"I don't believe I care for anything, thank, you. I'm just in their car pool."

Hall of Mirrors

"Arrogant? Moi?"

No-one messed with the Crays.

'He'll call you back. Right now he's getting his minimum daily requirement of sex and violence.'

"If anyone needs to take their medication with meals, now's the time."

'There he goes over the bag limit again!'