Galactic Comedian Pillows

On the way back from Mars, you wanna swing by the moon, just for laughs?

'Houston, I'm prepared to land...'

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

"Houston, we have a problem."

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

"Good Lord! Life on Mars...adorable life on Mars!"

God Sneezes Out Creation

"Remember when we used to wonder if there other beings somewhere out there?"

"Up here, light is neither a particle nor a wave. It's a liquid."

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

'You caught it, you gut it!'

"Stupid map ... that dot must cover 10,000 cubic light years."

'I don't know which was prettier - the meteor shower or the cascade of flaming space junk.'

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

Clown God

'Gravity...Go figure!'

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

Save Our Universe

"I've heard that seeing the earth from outer space can really change your perspective. I couldn't agree more."

'You've orbited the Earth in a NASA spacecraft! Wow! Me, I've jumped over the Moon...'

Man at penthouse party walks out onto terrace and is startled to see the Earth, instead of the moon, shining in the sky.

The Origins of Everything

"Before vaporizing this one, we need to file an environmental impact report."

STRIP God' s dog urinating on planet Earth

That's all very well sir, but is it full strength, low fat, high calcium or soy?

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.

Science fiction fans on other planets

"Remember when we kicked him off Mars?"