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Mother Nature

Apples for sale

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

Rape of the Lock- The Dream

Cat statues on entrance gate

"Does my bum look big in this aria?"

Aliens with abducted person look at a suggestion box.

Storm in a magic lamp.

"No one summons me anymore. They all have oil."

'Let me guess - you lost a fight against a young challenger who has now replaced you as the company's alpha male!'

A Newton's cradle wrecking ball.

"Well, I'm sorry. The 3 wishes I'm granting can't exceed the annual exclusion of $14,000."

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

'Now watch our sales increase.'

A divided world.

Cosa Nostradamus: "Listen, you mook. I predict if you don't pay the vig to the Don by tonight you'll be at the bottom of the Hudson by morning."

'There goes another one. Galileo, don't you have any idea what makes them do that?'

The Soundness of Newton's Laws

You know, if you made it with a sphere, it wouldn't need a railing. Plan.

Newton's vacation

"I really wanted to get you off but I didn't want to make a mockery of Justice."

'Sorry...I don't deal with lease issues.'

Macho man body building club.

"I want to make a wish, but the problem is that this genie apparently does not speak English."

"And for my third wish I want a further three!"

'After counsel said, 'You did it', the defendant said, 'Did not', followed by a, 'Did too'. . .'

"Your third wish should have been to make the first two wishes tax free."

Young Isaac Newton's first encounter with gravity.

'Rubbing it no longer produces a genie. Now you need a username, password and an unreadable CAPTCHA.'

'You've haed the eye exam. Now buy the t-shirt!'

Earl was obviously distressed, as he recounted under hypnosis how aliens had abducted him, and had their tax inspectors thoroughly examine his books.

'I can grant you 3 wishes as long as none of them are about getting up on the furniture.'

"I need a transfer from the wind tunnel departmnet please."

Optician: 'I can't seem to switch off.'

"I wish I could give you a pay rise, a bonus, and an extra week of vacation, but..."