Gadget Geek Pillows

"We began with a hip replacement and just sort of riffed off that."

To help emphasize good oral hygeine inkids, Dr. Remford installed a dental floss zipline in his office.

Christmas Technology

'And the best thing about this electric thermal underwear is, no batteries, it's solar!'

"Apparently our smart house decided it didn't need us anymore."

Computer thinks: 'I'm sure it's got a mind of it's own!'

'Sorry we had to kill you, but it was the only way we could get some computer tech support up here.'

'Brain surgery? I have an app for that!'

Pacemakers.

'It's the new iPed. It's a pedometer, a GPS, and it has apps that show you the nearest ice cream parlors and dessert shops.'

'It figures. If there's artifical intelligence, there's bound to be some artificial stupidity.'

'And its got this cool app on the end that lets you delete entries.'

'It can hold a thousand books, whatever 'books' are...'

'It's amazing, you've been here 8 hours and haven't set off the motion detector I set up in your work area.'

'You have to stop bringing all that work home. You're trying to send a fax from our toaster.'

'Encryption. You must be joking. It took me six months just to learn how to email.'

'I'm sorry, but I'm not allowed to sell you that smart phone without first verifying your IQ.'

'I don't know what it is. I think it's some kind of old-fashioned cell phone.'

The Department of Emerging Technologies.

Web cams. Web scams

"It's our latest driverless car. If even has a driverless backseat driver."

"iPad, huh? When I was your age, I remember getting hold of a piece of carbon paper once. Amused myself for days after I figured out how it worked."

Thanks to her new food-breath analyzer Cheryl could find out what her kids really had for lunch.

Bill stumbles upon an automated taco maker.

'My battery is dead. How does it end?'

Smart Arse Meter

Fred deciding which sort of power to use to cut wood for his wood burning air conditioner.

'Dozens of gauges and knobs, but not one cigarette lighter to plug in my heated travel mug.'

'My job as a carrier pigeon is a lot easier now I am using the GPS.'

"Our smart home must know how must clutter we have, because it took it upon itself to rent a dumpster."

"I feel like everybody's podcasting and nobody's podlistening."

'Thank you for calling Tech Support. Your computer is one month old. We no longer support that model. Good day.'

"Sometimes I wish they'd never perfected setless television."

The Short-Lived Laser Pointer/Printer Combo.

Man is dumber because of his smartwatch.