Future Relaxers T-Shirts

"Sure, I had a retirement plan. Stop going to work"

"Ahhh... close enough."

STRIP Hambone: Businessman in hospital with his computer

'The cruises and long vacations ensure I'm not micro-managing.'

"For heaven's sake lighten up, Roger! You're supposed to be on holiday."

'Now, dear, I spent 35 years pretending to look busy. I can't just quit overnight!'

"Your blood pressure is too high. Take two of these."

"First break since 1996!"

"What's wrong?"

'I've still got the fire in my belly, but for the next two weeks I'm solar powered.'

'But boss, this will keep my muscles from getting fatiqued.'

"Sometimes I stop to think and forget to start again."

"Have you ever tried buying lots of stuff?"

"My husband hid my laptop to stop me working on vacation."

'I'm sure looking forward to relaxing when we get to the summit.'

Lazy dog.

'Monday morning feeling? But it's thursday!'

'How's the executive training program, going?'

His entire life was about balance.

'My husband has retired from the bench.'

"Sidney gets nervous if he's too far from his money."

'The best part of growing old is not having to invest for the long term.'

"Since Frank retired two years ago, he's been on the alert for some long-dormant artistic talent to develop."

"Have you ever thought about dropping a few pounds, dear?"

'He unwound on his vacation and never wound up again!'

'Retirement became more tolerable when I installed this water cooler.'

"You never had to learn to relax, did you Fred?"

'Looking forward to your retirement, Campbell?'

"I'm thinking of installing some strobe lights to make it look like he's moving."

Speakers on holiday.

"You can leave the rat race – but they always find you."

Legalization of marijuana

'This massage chair's impossible - all I do is sit there and worry about missing a flight.'