Future Justice Gifts

You don't believe I could be a supreme court justice! You're ruining my self-esteem! F.Y.I? � Whiny tirades don't look good on a supreme court justice's record. Thank you for your candid assessments. I will certainly consider their merits. Fine judicial temperament. And reject them for their shallow insensitivity! Rejection overruled.

Trial by Media

"This is the most important election of our lifetime."

Nelson Mandela in despair over the crime rates in SA.

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

'There they go - off on their own - and a finer bunch of fledgelings one couldn't ask.'

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

"We're suing you under equal opportunities legislation for failure to represent our rights"

Early Adopter...Early Opt-Outer

"Hey, I just figured out how to sue the school for loss of my prime childbearing years."

"Now that's a win."

Your enemy is defeated by Fate

'What's wrong with those Europeans? We have more murders in this city than England, France Germany and Spain combined.'

Florida Governor, Rick Scott, cuts funding for rape victims.

The real murderer of Boris Nemtsov?

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

'I'm not playing 'Bride and Groom' unless you sign this pre-nuptial aggreement!'

The transparent safe box of Panama

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

Lady Justice and Confidential Files

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

'I think I'll become a lawyer.'

"When it comes to medical malpractice, most lawyers only go for the money... ...I go for the doctor's head."

"Who wrote this "Law of the Jungle" nonsense? It is highly biased in favour of predators!"

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

"Have you, or any of your acquaintances, ever been described as 'frolicsome'?"

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

"Now that I've swung back to depression, I'm truly sorry for what I did when I was manic."

Anti-war libra.

"Hello - I'm from the future..."

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

Stop and Birch

"Gimme a 'D'! Gimme an 'N'! Gimme an 'A'!"

"Tell us the one about swift justice, Grandpa."