Future Broadcaster Gifts

'How do you know he wants to go to college? Maybe he wants to be a sportscaster.'

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!

"... And in Canada today ... nothing happened."

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

Man from 'National Viewers and Listeners Association sits at work boxes titled; 'Switch on' and 'Switch off'.

"I could afford a degree in broadcast journalism, but not the makeup."

'Following your 'barbecue summer' forecast, I'm revising predictions of your contract being reviewed.'

"We interrupt this advertisement to bring you another advertisement that has just been rushed to the studio."

'We interrupt this Special Bulletin to give you an even more special bulletin!'

"This is Matt with your five day forecast, on location."

"The show's a big hit, but a little too risque. It's not worth the aggravation we're getting from the watchdog groups."

Obtaining a degree in TV Broadcasting.

"And now a word from our sponsors...ratings."

NEWS WEATHER SPORTS

"As you can see here - slow the tape, guys - these sparks are coming awfully close to the truck's gas tank, an explosive situation indeed..." Every high speed chase needs a color man.

'This has been a Chris Wallace special report -- we now switch you back to Mike Wallace....'

'For the next sixty seconds, this station will totally freak out....'

'After graduation, I plan on working in warrantless surveillance for the CIA. How about you?'

"Ah, summertime! Robert Potts is sitting in for Jim Jensen, who is sitting in for Harry Reasoner, who is sitting in for Walter Cronkite, who is on vacation."

"I attribute most of my problems in the third grade to the media."

"The Scottish Premier is to start using goal-line technology similar to the 'Hawkeye' system currently used in the premier league. It's expected 'Och-Aye' will be installed at all grounds in time for next season."

'There's nothing wrong with the sound, lady, it's a Party Political broadcast, that's all.'

'This network's news program has been unfairly charged with having a left leaning bias.'

"The much ballyhooed era of TV interactivity took a step closer to reality today."

"This is for all the things you have already heard about via social media."

'Other bad news' department.