Future Broadcaster T-Shirts

'How do you know he wants to go to college? Maybe he wants to be a sportscaster.'

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!

'My ultimate goal is to do product promo in a popular Super Bowl T.V ad.'

Anderson Cooper as a Kid. Today, an expose that asks the question: Who IS Simon, and why must we do what he says?

"... And in Canada today ... nothing happened."

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

"I could afford a degree in broadcast journalism, but not the makeup."

The Quack Quack Diaries: The Decline And Fall Of Wolfman Quack

Man from 'National Viewers and Listeners Association sits at work boxes titled; 'Switch on' and 'Switch off'.

'Following your 'barbecue summer' forecast, I'm revising predictions of your contract being reviewed.'

"We interrupt this advertisement to bring you another advertisement that has just been rushed to the studio."

'We interrupt this Special Bulletin to give you an even more special bulletin!'

'This has been a Chris Wallace special report -- we now switch you back to Mike Wallace....'

"And now a word from our sponsors...ratings."

'For the next sixty seconds, this station will totally freak out....'

"This is Matt with your five day forecast, on location."

NEWS WEATHER SPORTS

"As you can see here - slow the tape, guys - these sparks are coming awfully close to the truck's gas tank, an explosive situation indeed..." Every high speed chase needs a color man.

Obtaining a degree in TV Broadcasting.

"The show's a big hit, but a little too risque. It's not worth the aggravation we're getting from the watchdog groups."

TV News. Multiple drenching thunderstorms are forming over the region. What's your weather segment lead-in? "There's a soaker born every minute!"

"So, Mrs. Fessler, I understand you're a stand-up comic."

'After graduation, I plan on working in warrantless surveillance for the CIA. How about you?'

Your son is smart and curious and has no attention span whatsoever

'There's nothing wrong with the sound, lady, it's a Party Political broadcast, that's all.'

"I attribute most of my problems in the third grade to the media."

The young Lisa Laflamme.

'This network's news program has been unfairly charged with having a left leaning bias.'

"The Scottish Premier is to start using goal-line technology similar to the 'Hawkeye' system currently used in the premier league. It's expected 'Och-Aye' will be installed at all grounds in time for next season."

"Ah, summertime! Robert Potts is sitting in for Jim Jensen, who is sitting in for Harry Reasoner, who is sitting in for Walter Cronkite, who is on vacation."

"The much ballyhooed era of TV interactivity took a step closer to reality today."

"This is for all the things you have already heard about via social media."

'Other bad news' department.