Future Biker Gifts

"It's a bicycle. My dad lost our Christmas club money in Atlantic City so I won't get the rest of it until my birthday."

'Maybe next year, Santa will bring the wheels.'

I love your enthusiasm, girls, but we're not opening a can of whoop-ANYTHING.

"... And his piano teacher says that he definitely has Van Gough's ear for music."

'Mind taking off your scarf.'

Exercising

"Hello - I'm from the future..."

"We come from the future and just want to say: Hey, thanks for the planet!"

The team video didn't spotlight my talents. I've hired my own film crew. They'll showcase my skills so college recruiters can see my strengths. Wow! How can the director pack so much into one little video? Great point! Daddy? Tell Steven Spielberg we're going feature length. Nice save!

'Isn't it time you started thinking about cars instead of horsie rides?'

"To save enough money to buy my lowrider, I figure I need to keep my summer job for...10,734 days."

"Well, I'm just saying, buying me a cheap used car for graduation is not going to teach me responsibility."

"Whether they are his first words or not - E.V.'s do not make that sound!"

"My father was a Brexit negotiator and his father before him..."

"We're having a special today on bright futures."

'I need both hands for steering.'

"I know I'm going to get older - but how much?"

'I can't say what the market's going to do, but you're going to have fourteen children.'

They say animals have the sixth sense and the talent to look into the future...

"The humans would have really enjoyed this."

"Tea parties are passé. I'm opening a craft brewery."

'We do have a property in your price range, but we need a time machine to go back and visit it!'

"I see you naked. A beautiful young woman is leaning over you... Oh, hang on. She's performing your autopsy."

Taking to the sky...

"I couldn't get a signal while I was at the mall. I can now relate to those songs that sing about the blues."

"Well, come on Son, don't keep us in suspense. Did you pass your driving test?"

"I'm in a bad mood today: sit down!"

'We will conduct the background check. Our fortune, Madame Zula, will conduct a complimentary future check.'

Bike powered computer.

'Someone must have stolen your identity. Your fingerprints are missing.'

Your mother and I don't think the weekend lacrosse league is a good idea, Teddy. Why not? Too much driving. But I ride the school bus home from practice all week! Exactly! Our favorite mass transit vehicle! I can't wait to get my license!

"I'll have to cance your appointment for next Friday. I'm going to be sick in bed with the flu."

Mystic Writes 2014 Diary

"I think he's going to be a bus driver - he loves cutting things up."

Old Biker: Now that I'm a real biker, all the old babes will want my body.