Furry Friend Coach T-Shirts

"I wonder if the dumb obedience school gives a warranty..."

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

Beware of the Dog Hair.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were my dog Willie."

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

'Next!'

Menu: Wet food. Dry food

'You think it's easy, being married to a man who thinks of nothing but his work?'

'I can tell you one thing, Madam. These ears have been neglected...

'I think he got embarrassed because of the sweater. . . Another dog started laughing. I told him it was just wheezing, but he wasn't buying it.'

'Before I undertake my journey, I require you to make me a warrior's headband.'

"Hold my calls for a while, Wilson."

'Ben has his own cute little ways to show his dislike for dry food.'

"Owning a pet is a big responsibility, not to mention never wearing dark clothing again."

'Can't one eat in peace!'

'He's barking mad!'

"Yes, I came back. I always come back."

"OK, so just to recap: Small bowl is you, big bowl is me."

'You know, I almost envy you sometimes.'

'I would love to play in your tree-house, but I can't climb trees...'

'Out of the blue, my Master is now obsessed with having me sit, shake hands and rollover...'

Hal is such a nice guy, every dog in the neighborhood brings him slippers.

'Doctor Cameron, how fast! In the bladder already!'

'He was a lousy watch dog until we realized he was near sighted.'

"English: Walk?" "Dog hears: Edibles on the sidewalk!"

"This is the best news."

Work out buddies.

'Hunger is a terrible thing, especially around dinner time!'

"I've never heard of a PE teacher giving football homework."

'Must be worms, huh, Doc?'

Winter walk.

"Murchison’s theory is that it’s dog hair in your fuel line.”

"Guess who's the 'rendered'."

"I got you the same thing."

'I hope you both have many happy years together!'