Furry Friend Coach Pillows

"I wonder if the dumb obedience school gives a warranty..."

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

Beware of the Dog Hair.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were my dog Willie."

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

'You think it's easy, being married to a man who thinks of nothing but his work?'

'Next!'

Menu: Wet food. Dry food

'I think he got embarrassed because of the sweater. . . Another dog started laughing. I told him it was just wheezing, but he wasn't buying it.'

'I can tell you one thing, Madam. These ears have been neglected...

'Before I undertake my journey, I require you to make me a warrior's headband.'

"Hold my calls for a while, Wilson."

"Owning a pet is a big responsibility, not to mention never wearing dark clothing again."

'Can't one eat in peace!'

'Ben has his own cute little ways to show his dislike for dry food.'

'He's barking mad!'

"Yes, I came back. I always come back."

"English: Walk?" "Dog hears: Edibles on the sidewalk!"

'I would love to play in your tree-house, but I can't climb trees...'

'Doctor Cameron, how fast! In the bladder already!'

'You know, I almost envy you sometimes.'

'He was a lousy watch dog until we realized he was near sighted.'

'Out of the blue, my Master is now obsessed with having me sit, shake hands and rollover...'

"OK, so just to recap: Small bowl is you, big bowl is me."

Hal is such a nice guy, every dog in the neighborhood brings him slippers.

"This is the best news."

Work out buddies.

'Hunger is a terrible thing, especially around dinner time!'

"I've never heard of a PE teacher giving football homework."

"Guess who's the 'rendered'."

'Must be worms, huh, Doc?'

Winter walk.

"Murchison’s theory is that it’s dog hair in your fuel line.”

"I got you the same thing."

"Guess who caught a foul ball at Fenway ..."