Furry Drinking Companion Gifts

A stronger drink

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

'He rides in the car with his head out the window a lot.'

Dolphin friendly tuna

Beware of the Dog Hair.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were my dog Willie."

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

Baloneystini

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'You think it's easy, being married to a man who thinks of nothing but his work?'

'Next!'

'Democracy? -- do you REALLY want the bars closed every election day?'

"I'm getting cinnamon, brandy, nutmeg, a hint of Alsatian."

'I think he got embarrassed because of the sweater. . . Another dog started laughing. I told him it was just wheezing, but he wasn't buying it.'

'He's a tenacious lap dog.'

'I'll have toast and he'll have a complete dog's breakfast.'

"Hold my calls for a while, Wilson."

"I do like it here, but I'm ready for my own apartment."

"It's always so loud during yappy hour."

Owner Rolls Out Red Carpet For Large Cat

"Owning a pet is a big responsibility, not to mention never wearing dark clothing again."

'Can't one eat in peace!'

"Do you think we should get a pet?"

'Ben has his own cute little ways to show his dislike for dry food.'

"Yes, I came back. I always come back."

"Ok, boy, one more time, then I'd better get this thing back to the battlefield."

Local wildlife bringing an old beggar food.

"OK, so just to recap: Small bowl is you, big bowl is me."

Jerry had a difficult time coming up with cartoon ideas over the noise his dogs made. '...so then the cat says, 'No, thanks. I'll clean it myself.' 'Ha,ha! Yeah, that's a good one,Phil!'

"English: Walk?" "Dog hears: Edibles on the sidewalk!"

'You know, I almost envy you sometimes.'

'I would love to play in your tree-house, but I can't climb trees...'

Cat and Dog Fights.

Hal is such a nice guy, every dog in the neighborhood brings him slippers.