Furnishing A New Home Pillows

"If you're on a budget, I have something uglier."

'Isn't this the couch we sold at our yard sale? The one the cat peed on?'

Sofa Sale: 'I like this sofa - I'll take it.'

"It's also a flat-bed scanner."

Let's get organized

Domestic Superheroes!!

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

Painting by the numbers for adults

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

'Is that the only wallpaper you could find?!'

'We like the occasional drink on the patio.'

Do you mind if we stop calling this a "starter house" now?

Doing the borders.

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

Adhesive Tiles: Do Not Open from this End.

Second hand furniture.

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

Painting the Ceiling

Yardless: Please help

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

"Man's best friends."

Lazy Octopus