Fur Family Mediator Pillows

"On scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being 'can't live without him', how close were you to the cat?"

Vehicles are having their own election. These are the candidates. The ambulance appeals to voters who think health care is most important. Voters focusing on education issues favor the school bus. And those wanting family-friendly policies are backing the minivan. The tractor is an expert on agricultural issues, and the import is a free trade advocate. Those voters concerned about environmental issues like the electric hybrid, and those wanting a strong military support the Jeep. What's t

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

"His name is James Tom Dave Jon Lee Robert Glenn Joseph Tony Sam Barnes. We didn't want to hurt any relatives' feelings by not naming him after them."

"Cheers mate, you've done me a solid."

"If we can't find the way forward, let's find the way back."

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

Men Working Things Out

"Go ask your mother ... and I'll tell you why she's wrong."

'I'm with my minister father and my senator mom through the week and my senator mom through the week. I'm the ultimate division between Church and State.'

"You'll hear from my lawyer."

"The emotional support goes both ways."

"Just sign it, or I'll post YOUR old report cards on social media."

"Someday, my dimwitted son, all this will belong to your sister."

'I'm NOT being a tattle-tale! -- I'm being a reliable source!'

"Jeez, calm down, Bill. We're not saying you're wrong... Just that you're an idiot."

'Oh you mean that silly little email.'

"So what if you were adopted from the shelter! As fas as I am concerned, you're still my brother and I love you! come here..."

"I'm sorry madam but we don't make them go missing."

'Hoping to help me with dinner, are you?'

'Um...Excuuuse me?! Apparently you've forgotten the household peacekeeping policy.'

"My client, whom I shall refer to as your son, has retained me to represent him in these negotiations regarding an increase in his allowance!"

"I'm sorry, 'Because I said so' is not an acceptable answer."

"We want to make sure that your wish for us to give you grandchildren has nothing to do with your concerns about future vacancies at your chicken processing plant."

You need to stay home and study. Mom! It's an educational opportunity

"Occupiers have often forced people who are polar opposites to live in one artificial 'country'."

The Supreme Court, Juvenile Divisio: "As usual, the obvious precedent for this case is the children v. Mommy."

"You shouldn't be ashamed of yourself. A lot of parents aren't smart enough to help their 7-year-old with their homework."

A policeman and protester in the same family.

Cat steals food from owner who is distracted by feeding the dog.

'Hers his. That's not fair.'

'I know I should be thankful I have a good home, but if he talks baby talk to me one more time, I swear I'll go for his throat.'

"Your mother and I are separating because I want what's best for the country and your mother doesn't."

The Downside of Nepotism

'And if you think it isn't yours I'll see you at the DNA testing!'