Funniest Home Detective Pillows

Ed, Private Eye: 'Specializing in missing socks & TV remotes.'

'Darling - I think it's time to stop feeding the birds.'

'...and remember, son, never throw up on an old carpet...wait until they get a new one!'

"I feel like tearing of all your clothes and putting them in the washing machine."

Yard Sale

'Oh, Olivia, I just love your new caption! Where on earth did you find it?'

'Beware you don't trip over him!'

'I didn't hear you calling. I can't listen to everybody who yells at me.'

Vocation,vocation,vocation.

"I see the cat's left us another little offering."

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

Those missing socks...where do they go?

'Classic literature for D.I.Y. haters'

Carpet Cows

'She let the bedbugs bite.'

Please Wait Here To Be Scolded

"Well, obviously the victim had a French enemy."

"Wow . . . We could really fill this room with uncomfortable silences."

"And that was my day at the office. Thanks, Alice, you've been a great audience!"

'I see you have been mopping the floor while I was out. Are you doing this to be nice or disposing of evidence?'

'You may be the CEO of a large corporation, but at home you're an OMW, observe my whims!'

VARIOUS ITEMS OF LABELLED KITCHENWARE.

Need something from the fridge? This looks like a job for...Indoorman!

CartoonStock Upload

"You rang?"

"Maybe Dracula wasn't the best one to try this new detergent."

"Okay, I get the message."

'He died of too much money.'

"I bought this awesome wonder bra."

"So, you've got butterflies in your stomach, a bug in your ear and a bee in your bonnet. Any other complaints?"

'It's a dump, but it's a steal at this price.'

"There's food in the fridge, and clues about the state of our marriage all around the house."

'In another universe parallel to our own.'