Fun-loving Skeptic Pillows

'I can't believe you think that hypnotist was for real.'

Open House of Horrors

'You will meet a sexy, honest fortune teller who will take all your money!'

'How can we believe anything when we can disprove everything?'

'Your videotape's intriguing - But it still doesn't prove that they really exist.'

Science Museum. Why are you skeptical about the things scientists say? Because they claim the universe is expanding but when I visited my childhood hometown, everything was smaller.

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

Annual Swim Hundreds of Miles, Spawn and Die Marathon.

"I know it looks fine, but let's get an engineer's report and a termite inspection just to be on the safe side."

'Hope it's legit. I never had the chance to say good riddance.'

'We studied the multiplication table in school today -- frankly, I don't believe a word of it.'

'OK, now you've seen it...'

Library. Story Hour. This fact-checking site says no cow has ever jumped over the moon.

'Now, as many of you know, I was the Monkey's uncle...'

Descartes's Demon

"This is just a placebo cast, but it makes a lot of people feel better."

'Don't believe everything you read.'

"What do you want to be when you give up?"

"We also stock non-alcoholic wine" "Why?"

'I've had raging hormones for the last 80 years.'

"You are gullible and naive. You believe untrained charlatans. You squander your money."

A person is reading another person's thoughts.

"IDEOMOTOREFFECT. See! I told you."

'Maybe you just can't have hope and change at the same TIME.'

Ponzi Schemes Inc

PERSONNEL, 'Your resume has everything but verisimilitude.''

They all have to get down the slide in 2.7 seconds or we lose our funding. In schools soon: The recess aptitude test.

'Lincoln Standardized Test Center - formerly Lincoln High School'

'I blame the internet.'

"We didn't learn anything today. We had to unlearn what the substitute taught us yesterday."

"Your god can't stop his own priests from raping children in his own churches. So what makes you think he can help you find your T.V. remote?"

"My religion makes sense if you want it to."

"So is Cameron Diaz really a babe, or is that another thing we've been led to believe by the biased media?"

'Trust Me, I am an Estate Agent.'

"I wonder if we'll still have to eat kale this summer."