Fun-loving Corporate Crusader Gifts

You have to admit he brings a certain 'jole de vivre' to the office!

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

"This position has become very important to the company."

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

Businessman on stilts: 'I had to step over a lot of people to get where I am today.'

'The good news is we're projecting a profit. The bad news is none of us will be alive then.'

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

'Well the good news is that we've landed some huge contracts in China!'

'Office' block tightening it's belt

Boss to worker taking out wallet: 'It's only fair, Pete. Last year, we shared profits!'

"They've hiked up our targets again...I'm going to have to put in some overtime to have any chance of meeting them!"

'How would you feel about working in a small pond?'

Office pics on dinner table.

'Excellent!...We've been looking to hire someone who can think outside the box.'

'I'm surprised you like being your own boss. I am your boss and I hate it.'

'I don't want your input until you produce some output.'

"Everyone, please welcome our new VP of being promoted and paid lots more than you for no apparent reason!"

"He'll do anything to say in power."

"Yes, we do accept resumes online, but there's more to it than giving me your computer with your resume on it."

Dogs reviewing organizational chart - 'Hunter can eat Spanky or Fido, Spanky can eat Spot or Duke,....' and so on.

Thesaurus Company

"Not bad, considering no one knows exactly what we produce or sell here."

'Make them a four billion dollar takeover offer, but don't cause a fuss.'

The role of administration.

'Not exactly what I meant by job creation.'

Surprised chicken: 'I know. I can't believe it either.'

"Good boy, what a good boy. You're hired."

"After an extensive analysis of your company's strengths and weaknesses our recommendation is to give us more money."

"I haven't the slightest idea who he is. He came bundled with the software."

"When I said, 'I want you to sleep on it'. I menat when you go home tonight."

'We'll be outsourcing Main Street.'

Told you...Nonsense compulsive disorder.