Fun Job Seeker Gifts

'We need someone to walk the plants.'

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

"My political platform focuses on more ice cream and more frisbee chasing, with less chores and fewer baths."

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

The trend toward less formal offices began to gain steam.

'He lives for his holidays.'

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

"There are no big jobs, only small machines."

'Your decade of experience is, unfortunately, from the wrong decade.'

'A depressing thought just came over me. Now we'll have to go out and get a job!'

"I love you in a suit. You look so... employed."

How are you at decision making?

PERSONNEL, 'Why did you leave your previous employment?', 'They asked too many questions!'

'You say you were King of the Jungle, but it seems your experience is mainly in savannah grassland...'

I'm getting ready to apply for college. Do you have a list of party schools?

'Your main goal in this job is getting out alive.'

"My biggest weakness? I'm a perfectionist."

"Don't get the wrong idea about those years in a mental institution. I was employed there."

Do you have any other skills?

'Don't start timing me yet! This staple won't come out!'

In and Out Sourced.

"Let's break the record for non-stop deranged barking."

You're next, Mr. Kimble - right after his apple danish.

If you're happy and you know it...

'Ron's not drunk - he's pouting because we won't play Pictionary.'

Between Offices

'Do you do self-deprecating humour?'

'A short economics test - if you bought something for