Frustrated Shopper Pillows

Buy on-line - Fill in form, Fill in form again, And again, Lose form, Fill-in form a few more times, Give up and go to shop...

What's the sale price on scones? Zero percent off. It's a sale in name only. I see. How many can I get at the sale price? The sale mentality mocks me.

Customer Avoidance Dept.

'I'll buy this only if the store opens the X@!!! plastic clam shell packaging for me!!!'

"I was at home all day yesterday so when do I want you to re-deliver? Yesterday!"

"Hello, police? I'd like to report a daylight robbery."

Smart card.

Mall Directory: You are here, but your mind is somewhere else.

"I need a pitchfork that's just a pitchfork."

"Yikes! So many foundations, so little time."

"What kind of bra are you looking for?"

Down on Her.

'I'm sure they make it up in volume.'

'All our appliances come with energy saving device - off/on switch.'

'I don't want to go school shopping! Can't you just buy stuff for me?. . .Just get me more of this in the next size up!'

Cash Rebate

'No, officer, I'm not a homeless beggar. I'm just waiting on my wife while she's shopping.'

Customer Service - I don't know and I don't care.

“We need eggs, milk, bread... Oh, and get an extra-large tub of outrage. We’re running low.”

Car Dealer

"I just want Velveetaaaaaaa!"

End Of Consumer Confidence Sale

'Midnight Galas, dinner at the Captain's table, the Swinging Singles Bar, exotic tropical nights... if I may say so, Miss Winslow... this cruise is you!'

Why men hate shopping.

It says 'item is returnable if repackaged exactly as sent.'"

"The diet section is located next to the snack bar."

"We save all the original packaging in case we have to return something."

"Happy Easter!"

Coming soon: The Garden of Eden Shopping Center.

"Honestly, I think this was a waste of money."

'Philip was cute this morning. He said money's tight and I should only buy what I need.'

'No Wallmart...No Target...No mall...How can you call this paradise?'

'It's the only way I can get him to help me with the shopping.'

'It's been raining all day. There's nothing to do.'

Supermarket - 'Buy One, Get 5kg Of Packaging Free'