Frustrated Shopaholic Gifts

It says 'item is returnable if repackaged exactly as sent.'"

Smart card.

"Yikes! So many foundations, so little time."

Buy on-line - Fill in form, Fill in form again, And again, Lose form, Fill-in form a few more times, Give up and go to shop...

"What kind of bra are you looking for?"

Shopping Torture

"Wait, Daddy! I'm that window’s target audience!"

Customer Service - I don't know and I don't care.

Complaints (just kidding).

"I balance my manic compulsive buying with manic buyer's remorse."

"We save all the original packaging in case we have to return something."

Microscope's R Us. 'What do you mean out 'No Refunds' small print is too small.'

"Happy Easter!"

"Honestly, I think this was a waste of money."

The customer is always right, but that fact has no standing in law.

"I was at home all day yesterday so when do I want you to re-deliver? Yesterday!"

'Isn't this cool? I ordered 'em all over the internet!'

This computer has been free of hasty, online-purchases for 37 minutes.

'I was going to buy myself a new outfit today, but I'm meeting pockets of resistance.'

'We'd rather not let you withdraw any money, Mrs Everhart - our computer thinks you'd just waste it.'

What's the sale price on scones? Zero percent off. It's a sale in name only. I see. How many can I get at the sale price? The sale mentality mocks me.

'Ugh! Savings sprees are so dull.'

'Well, that's the lot, Miss Jones - you're fired!'

'Just stopped off for a few things along the way!'

"I've never learned to go shopping on an empty credit limit."

'I hardly missed you, thanks to the internet.'

Customer Avoidance Dept.

Opening Monday - Closing Friday.

"Could I have two minutes of your time madam. We are today collecting for harassed shoppers!"

"Relax! It's NOT a heart attack! The owner's manual says to expect intense panic during the unpacking stage, as you wonder how in the world you're going to pay for yet another totally impulsive purchase. It should pass in a day or so!"

Man at complaints window gets redirected to the next window.

'C'mon, Dad, let me borrow it. I'll be careful. I won't scratch it. What harm can come to a credit card?'

'Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.' - 'Blah, blah, blah.' - 'Ahem.' - 'Blah, blah, blah, blah.' - 'Blah, blah.' - 'Excuse me.' - 'Does it look like we want to help you?!' -

"We're looking at a true patriot - she heard the US economy is in trouble."

Drugstore signs - 'really gross stuff...'