Fruit Punster Pillows

Apple talks to banana, as pear looks on, saying: 'Look, it's hard to explain ??" you're just a funny guy, OK?'

Larry's Literary Market.

"Where's all your fish?" "I never should have bought 'coy' fish."

Dogs life

Chicken soup for the sole.

'She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me...'

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

'Its a dogwood tree. I can tell by its bark.'

Prize vegetables with rude names.

Deviled HamDeviled Eggs.

You heard right - one large cheese pizza, and tell the driver to take it out of the box and leave it in the yard,

"I do lover a good prawn film!"

"Nobody loves me." "Yeah, nobody listens to me. Not even my wife." "My kids don't respect me."

Technical Terms Explained: Suckers.

"I'm afraid there will be more cuts."

The vegan hunter

"Are you sure this is the Irish guacamole?"

Fleas Navidad.

"Yes, sir, it's Houstonia Michauxii and it prefers shade or semi-shade."

Lemming meringue pie.

International Carrot Day April 4th

"Lots of people want to hold me, but no one really cares."

Vegan Insomnia

Leaflet

"Here, try this anti-dandruff fertiliser my gardener recommended."

"Processed food was his undoing. He was eating a salad sandwich in the warehouse, when a pallet of pork pies fell on him!"

"Of course, in life he was allergic to them."

'I'm not the first visionary who's been accused of extreme optimism.'

"There's no need to call me names, Slime-Breath!"

'What do you mean you want a pay rise??? You only work once a year!!!'

After 10 years, the great potato race of 1997 was finally declared a tie.

"Duffer, Penny, Bailey & Coco. Attorneys at Gnaw."

fried eggs...

"He's one of my favourites. You feed him milk and cookies and he gives you a present."

"The Ford will give you a son, and you will call him a manual."