Fruit Bowl Observer T-Shirts

"Looks like it's time to make the banana bread."

Apples for sale

'The circle is complete!'

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

"His mother had a great influence on him. She always made him eat his fruits and vegetables."

Gooseberry Fool...

"Isn't it an amazing co-incidence that this is an orange, and it IS ORANGE?"

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

Ball as water-melon.

"I just need help getting the pit out."

"Believe me it's only an apple."

Repulse Monkey. Difficult position, but one day it may save your life. Get it right!

'That's the problem with living with an artist, the fruitbowl is always off...'

The Brazilian Blow dry

""Stop fidgeting. This is supposed to be a still-life."

Making healthy eating bearable.

I love what you've done with your hare.

I never heard of chunky style wine. I couldn't find any seedless grapes.

"I just found a lacto-vegan restaurant and Janet from accounts says she's FRUITAIAN!"

Strawberry Shake

"I'm sorry, we advertised for an 'Au Pair'."

"Yes, it is hot in here."

"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious day when you're ripe and not yet mealy?"

Cover Design for the Savoy (No. 4)

Banana

"And then, after they were done with their bodies, they baked them at 350 degrees for an hour."

Johnny Appleseed's Dirty Little Secret

'Chocolate covered raisins, chocolate covered strawberries...is not what I mean when I said that fruit is healthy for you.'

"Do you have these apples in green?"

Doctor to patient: 'Tell me about these melon-collie feelings.'

How can I ensure I'm getting 100 orange juice? Buy an orange!

"Your blood sugar tested positive for fruits and vegetables."

"I love the way next door never tidy their garden - it's the perfect source of blackberries for our apple crumble."

'Our health plan is quite simple. You get a shiny apple each day.'

"Did you hear? The new apples are out today!"