Friend With Kids Pillows

'My, your children are well-behaved!'

'Still having problems finding a baby sitter?'

"Sorry I'm late, the crosstown is running local."

Mummies and babies having a natter over lunch.

'Still having a hard time finding day care?'

'I keep it this way on purpose, for speedy reference.'

'Ahhh...'

'Don't leave baby alone with this really cool tiny phone. It's a choking hazard.'

Dog Walking and Child Walking.

'Of course you can hear a rattle!'

"My baby doesn't cry. When she's upset, she texts a crying face emoji."

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

A young Don King

I will study my speling words...

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

"What do you think I can get for it on the blackboard market?"

"I give up. Where's the power button?"

My book report is based on the audio book of the same name.

Twenty-first century baby walker

Timmy had one heck of a security blanket.

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN!, 'Boy, talk about psychobabbl!'

"Bad things happen to people who don't buy my cookies, Sir."

Dog with saucepan stuck on its head

'In Show and Tell today, I showed my birthmark! I got expelled!'

"Never mind how I got up here....just call the fire department."

'I know what you're thinking, are those legal shoes.'

'I'm lost, did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me ?'

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

"I'm exempt from the company fitness program. I have triplets at home."

"I wish they'd never discovered fertility drugs!"

'Look. Billy Curry did a nude!'

Boys making skis from bits of fence.

'You still owe me the pony from last year!'

Kid to kid: 'I can't be wearing out my welcome. I didn't even step on it.'