Friend With A Beagle Gifts

"Like a lot of Beagles, he's pretty domesticated, but there's still some of the hunter in him."

Things to do: 1. Sit 2. Stay 3. Sit 4. Stay

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

Dog Hunting Trophies.

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"This never happened."

Dog with saucepan stuck on its head

"He sits there all day waiting to chase the email man."

"Never mind how I got up here....just call the fire department."

'Out, damned Spot.'

'Can you give him something to relax his jaws?'

"Big n' tall" "Small n' long"

"I see you mister mail carrier... that's it, just keep walking... don't even think abo—did you just look at my house?! Are you looking for trouble? Cujo ain't got #!@* on me."

"Lori, I can’t talk right now — I’m right in the middle of updating my dog’s Facebook page."

"I think I'm beginning to embrace humiliation."

Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold,

Labrador Non-retriever

Dog scared of a toad jumps onto a 'Beware the Dog' sign.

This is Giselle, our bichon frise, and Fred, our legacy pet.""This is Giselle, our bichon frise, and Fred, our legacy pet."

Dog on balconey in city sniffing tree in pot

"I yip, therefore I am."

"If you could live your life all over again, what dead animals would you roll in?"

"Oh, for Pete’s sake – it’s the ocean!"

"Yeah, I've put on a lot of weight, but my master's favourite command is "sit, sit, sit!" I barely ever get to exercise..."

"What's that smell, girl? Is it spring?"

Fetching some fuel.

"The vet made me wear this, and I can't lick my balls...uh...could I lick yours for awhile, Rex?"

"True, it is 'organic.' It's also a dead squirrel!"

"Have you consider the possibility that I don't want the paper?"

'Real hungry? Should be, 'Really hungry.' Adjectives take adverbs.'

'No need to shout.'

"Ever since I started reading the newspaper online, he's been bringing me my laptop."