Fridge Raider Pillows

"You came up in therapy this morning."

Man at work sees in lounge refrigerator, 'Creative Juices'

3 a.m. A knock on the door. It's the police. He feared the worse. Might have to share the last piece of cake.

"Yes, the are crazy, but they can open the fridge."

'You put him on a diet, so he put you on a diet.'

'Well, EX-C-U-U-S-E ME!'

"It's an alarm sensor. It barks like a dog when someone's at the door."

"I'm the Chupacabra, your new family bogeyman! I'm here to scare you into doing what your dad tells you to do!"

Diet Enforcer

"To be vegetarians, we have to get rid of this beef and bacon...chorizo...eggs...and these chicken pot pies and pepperoni pizzas!"

"I thought we agreed no midnight snacks?"

"Remember when he was little and we couldn't get him to eat? Now he never stops!"

"There's no milk! Where's the milk!"

"I'm afraid that walking to the refrigerator 5 or 6 times a day does not count as exercise."

His condition is known as Insom-nom-nom-nom-nia.

"I was just... uh... looking for the low-fat yogurt."

"Feed a fever, feed a cold...I'm pretty much for feeding any ailment."

'Oh, Fred does exercise. He takes frequent walks to the refrigerator.'

"Is that a new yoga position... Downward-Facing Hog?"

'This refrigerator isn't big enough for the both of us.'

New Years Resolutions.

'This might be the common ground we've been looking for.'

'I never babysit for anyone who doesn't have a well-stocked fridge!'

'Do we have any empty calories in this house!!'

Marvin opens a whole new can of worms.

'Linda, your boy friend is here to visit our refrigerator.'

High Calorie Area - Run For Your Life

'When he opens the refrigerator door, the only thing in there that's safe is the little light bulb.'

'I see you're hacking the fridge again.'

'He started sleep-walking right after I took the lock off the refrigerator.'

"Honey, you forgot to feed the starter!"

"Well, if you were snoring at 3 a.m., I’d probably be in the refrigerator with the cat, too."