Frequent Flyer Frustration Pillows

"We get your point about legroom, now please put them back in the cabin"

'You want a shuffle flight to Buffalo?'

"How come airlines think they should get aid when we don't?"

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

'Flight simulator'

"Now boarding group 50 and up."

Airport Security. Remove Shoes. What do they call the guy in charge of all this airport security? "The TSAR"!

Homing pigeons in therapy.

'Hey, can I have your frequent flier points?'

'One small step for man. Hundreds of thousands of miles for my frequent flier program.'

'Would yo like reading or non-reading?'

Airport security - next step?

"Emotionally, I'm checking three bags."

"You must be in seat 2D."

'I'll bet my luggage ends up at another hospital.'

Elite-Premium Passengers

'Does N.A.S.A. give frequent flyer miles?'

Ryanair refunds

"I'm sorry, but the flight of the bumblebees has been cancelled."

'Your honor, my client requests the maximum bail possible so that he can post it with his frequent-flier credit card.'

Bob landed in Hell. And to make matters worse, they lost his luggage.

"Bad news. Our luggage went to the same place my old job did."

"If I hear one more buzz I will pull this car over!"

"This is your captain speaking. I'm delighted to announce that all you frequent flyers members on board today will earn five credits at the college of your choice."

"So that's what this is all about? Frequent Flyer Miles?"

"The possibilities are endless!" "The possibilities ended."

'I'm a frequent flier, so it's really quite cheap.'

Customer to airline clerk: 'If I drop leaflets out the plane window, do I get frequent flyer miles?'

"And here we have a very rare and unusual piece titled 'The Last Remaining Open Seat.'"

Airplane Catches Woman's Washing.

Image of Santa on a plane with a reindeer.

Intelligent Navigation Device...

"This passport is so weak that I need a visa to enter my own country."

"Back! Back! Rows twenty and higher only!"

'Over five thousand so far - how many frequent-flower miles have you got?'