Freezer Fixer Pillows

'Oh no, freezer's on the blink again!'

'Freezer is on the blink.'

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

How to Deal With Leftover Turkey

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

Unable to afford scaffolding, Dave ties plungers on his feet to get up a wall.

"Whoa. There's a huge crack down here." "Tell me about it."

"Are you sure there wasn't a floor model?"

"Fido's determined to find that bone."

'Are you sure you brought the right flat pack?'

George was a bit intimidated by his IKEA self-assembly wardrobe.

'I use these ice cubes to make minor home repairs.'

"I thought you were out front telling the fence company how to do their job."

"She does this when she's tired."

"I told you we needed deeper foundations!"

Chair - Ready for Self Assembly.

DIY.

Philip Nye – cycle chiropractor

'Yes, you were abandoned. But then I adopted you. Why are you still taking it out on my couch?'

Super glue . . .

"I bit someone once, but It was just to establish credibility."

Irritable dowel syndrome

Home Business - Printer Ink.

"Now just open wide and relax. Uncle Fred has told me he has a way to fix your braces faster and cheaper than that overpriced orthodontist."

Jude completely misunderstands his doctor's request for a stool sample.

'Bob will be with you in a moment. He's cleaning the filter to the wine-aroma-judging-device attached to his face.'

'Are you ready for me to read the instructions yet?'

Nobody new the identity of the mad bandager

"It ain't pretty. You got a bad flap-valve leak, and your tenor drones are all gunked up. It'll be a week at least, IF I can get the parts. I do got a loaner, but she ain't much."

Unfinished Furniture.

"Kick the machine"

"Dad, I'll assemble yours if you assemble mine."