Free-sample Seeker T-Shirts

"Gimme a large cone with a sample of everything."

"Sign my yearbook?"

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

Bad for you but to die for

Try to guess the continent dining...

"I, TikTok."

"Bad morning. I was running late and skipped my coffee, diet soda, energy drink and Ritalin."

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

Somewhere in France

Chef picking salad leaves from a hanging basket outside his restaurant.

"Can I have another free biscuit for my dog?" "Sure." "Can you warm this one up? Maybe sprinkle some cinnamon and sugar on it, and maybe make it three biscuits?" "You sure this is for your dog?" "Can you also sprinkle a little turkey on it?"

Food samples in supermarket - 'There's a stick in mine.'

'English homework leaves a pleasant after taste. History takes like fast food. But math is a real bummer on my digestive tract.'

Trillion dollar Dream Merchants - on a screen near you.

Then I rapidly add cream and butter to the sauce. Ah, get rich quick!

Pat's Bar, Rotgut Tasting 5-7.

Nothing puts the flavor in a hot dog like a sports event.

"Can I borrow a pen?"

'Just sign your approval for the heliport and we can both go about our business.'

Man with fake beard gets a package from the Beard of the Month club.

'I've learned that adding water to coffee only weakens the effect.'

'I'm part of a double-blind study to see how weight loss supplements help people lose weight. I'm guessing I received the sugar pill placebos.'

'Meet the Author'/'Meet the Plagiarist' - An Author and a Plagiarist selling and signing the same book story and title.

"Sorry, that was the three cups of coffee, four cans of red bull, and double dose of Paxil talking."

'Head cheese? Swedish sausage? Limberger cheese? . . . Try Albania!'

"The president wants me to stay on as unemployed."

"It's not enough -- others must follow me on social media."

'I had a taste of my own medicine yesterday - Yuck!'

'Personally, I've always liked Bordeaux with my Swiss.'

'Which' Consumer Testing Whiskies

Harold pushed the 25 coffee refills to the limit

"I used to be a foodie. Now I'm a fussy glutton."

"You've signed my book in tomato sauce..."

Holistic Alcohol Consumption

'Wow! What energy drink are you on?'