Fraud Awareness Gifts

Fake medical receipt

Big finger print trying to forge a cheque but he can't.

'I can't believe an Alligator stole my identity... I mean, it's quite obvious I'm a Crocodile!'

'You realize, of course, that that's the fifth 25 stake we've now sold in our entertainment division.'

"He's doing it again, your honor!"

"Times are perfect for us masochists!..."

"Yes, we're a letterbox company. How can I help you?"

I'd rather be phishing.

Goal!

Bernard Madoff's House Arrest.

'I don't know what to do about my check - grief or anger counseling.'

"As your cell bitch, I imagine my Sarbanes-Oxley expertise should come in quite handy."

Fraud Squad

'Stop kicking the back of my chair!'

"I think it's just human nature to set up a private special purpose business entity to conceal balance sheet transaction in order to maximize an earnings forecast."

"On earth that is all ya know and all ye need know- except at tax time."

'Really, a foreign wine? What will the NSA think?'

'It says take all your medication,if you can afford it.'

"Would you believe it, that pensions liberation plan was just an on-line scam..."

"That's the parents' section."

'The most common side effect of this medication is loss of disposable income.'

'Considering time, temperature, and your lack of health insurance, I wouldn't eat the deviled eggs.'

"I told mom I won't answer her calls in case a scammer got her number."

"I didn't go to college, but I took out and am defaulting on school loans to make it look like I did."

"First we need to do a wallet-scan"

'Who do you think you're kidding? -- There's no such thing as a 'triploon'!'

'Most businesses point their CCTV cameras at property they want to protect. . . not at what they want to watch on the webcam...'

'Fred is terrified of identity theft.'

"Move over! - I just got the bill!"

'The insider traders always sit together.'

'I'm just saying we should take into account the health cost of nine lifetimes.'

'Your bloodwork reveals a slightly worrisome health plan.'

'It's your wife on camera 3 again!'

Gas prices

'60 for pulling a tooth, thats a bit much.' 'Your yelling chased away our clients.'