Fragrance Fanatic Gifts

"Yes, but it's naturally toxic."

'Even if she does say you're turning her hair gray, why don't you get her some nice cologne?'

'Drive 'em wild with the sweet scent of net profits exceeding forecasts due to higher gross margins and cost-cutting.'

Sweet Smell of Success $10.

Overpowering perfume

'Have you got something that smells like a skateboard?'

"May I say that's a lovely combination of cyclomethicone, triisostearin, and propylene carbonate you're wearing today, Dr. Thomas!"

'I don't know why, but our new natural perfume line just isn't selling.'

Dangerous parfum.

Pheromones.

'He'll like this perfume. It has that new car smell.'

"The antidote is $150."

'Have you no common scents?!'

'He will love this cologne. It smells like an undervalued stock.'

A dog spraying eau de toilet.

"No, if wanted his undivided attention, I'd dress like a mailman"

Running late for his date and out of deodorant, Todd makes a desperate move.

Eau de Colon.

"Denial, by Beverley."

'BIGGO PERFUME CO - Back in a phew minutes.'

'So, if I don't get laid this weekend can I have a refund?'

'Nothing for me, thanks -- I'm just here for the aroma therapy.'

New celebrity perfume - 'It smells of money.'

"After Brexit we've had to rename our Boris Johnson eau de cologne, 'eau de Dover'."

'It's my secret to meeting girls. It covers the odor of school bus with the smell of a new car.'

"Do you have any Nine O'clock Madness? I'm not allowed out past ten."

"I'm sorry Madam, but you knew this perfume was dangerous when you brought it"

Bad news, our men's aftershave has just been listed as an environmental hazard.

'Say what you like about the All Black scrum, but it's clearly the most fragrant and well groomed in the modern game.'

Soap shop - "Do you have any that smell of soap?"

Locker room: the scent.

'Peter! Ease up on the after-shave!'

"You got maybe one that smells like cheese blintzes frying?"

"Do you have one called 'repent'?"

'I want something that will make me smell like George Clooney.'