Fragrance Alchemist Gifts

"I've decided - I want to create my own essence."

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

"This brew is quite hoppy - they must of added too much toad."

'I work two jobs and have three kids. At the end of the day I am exhausted. Do you have anything that is not sexy and just smells good.'

"I want something that will make Richard Burton sit up and take notice."

Woman pouring perfume into her bath.

'Needs salt!'

'Have you no common scents?!'

"You got maybe one that smells like cheese blintzes frying?"

"But everyone else gets to market their own personal scent!"

Men's fragrances...

"Finally a perfume store my husband will enjoy visiting."

Some scents are nonsense.

'Does this perfume have an antidote?'

"It's our latest scent...Dryer Sheet."

"I'm not saying your after shave smells bad, but.. maybe you should use one mosquitoes don't like so much!"

Aromatherapy for Men

"The antidote is $150."

'No, that's not my shaving lotion. We've been burning cow chips in the wood stove.'

The day wasps discovered there's something about an Aqua Velva Man.

"It's not expensive, sir, when you consider it's long smell-by date!"

Pheromones.

''Spiced mill cider and home made apple pie.' Am I supposed to freshen the room with this or have it for dessert?'

'It's for the girl who's in a hurry.'

'This is a very powerful perfume -- there's a ten-day waiting period.'

"By the way, thanks for the cologne!"

'He's not getting lucky tonight. He smells too good.'

Gah! My Timotei is dead. - 'But what have we here? Tresemme with orange, mango, and passionfruit.' - 'Mmmm... passionfruit...' - '*Glug* *Glug* *Glug*' -

'Do you have any of that after shave that makes me look like Brad Pitt?'

"It's less of a spell than it is a signature scent."

"It's our latest celebrity scent, it's called Elon Musk. It smells like money!"

'Sure I said I love 'new car smell', but not as an aftershave.'

Jane Krakowski

'Nothing to give him an excuse to say I smell like a cemetery'

'Drive 'em wild with the sweet scent of net profits exceeding forecasts due to higher gross margins and cost-cutting.'