Foul Ball Fancier T-Shirts

'Look at the foul ball I caught at the baseball game last night.'

Tell me again how aloof and independent cats are.

'This has all the makings of a fable. But first lets take lots of tests.'

Alternative fielding positions

"Why is there so much emphasis put on our stupid race?" "I think people are more interested in it as a metaphor than as an actual race." "Slow and steady wins the race, that sort of thing." "That would explain why I always lose..." "Bartender, another please." "Maybe you should slow down." "You never learn do you?"

'I think he's doing ok, the coach says he has the attention span of a goldfish.'

'I'll place the bets. You just be sure to hit the hare with the tranquilizer.'

'If you're out and about today don't forget the pith helmet.'

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

"After the big race, the tortoise and the hare are ordered to provide urine samples."

Hare tells tortoise: 'Remembe the plan: on the final stretch, you go down.'

"Same hectic routine every damn year. Mind if I hang back with you?"

Androcles, the Lion, and Sid, health insurance auditor.

Pigeon Memos

"It's all show-as soon as Marks gone he switches off the football and reads Proust..."

' Sheesh! I think people are getting tired of hearing those fables of Aesop's

"They're perfect astronauts. Fast velocity followed by a long, slow pace."

Servant running after a couple dressed up for a fancy ball with the door-key

'He intentionally entangles his face mask in my hand!'

Scrabble with the Hares and Tortoise

Yes, I am slow, but my life expectancy is way longer than yours, so I can still achieve a lot in life...

Justice for a heckler.

Aesop's Fables: The Fox and the Crow

'Then, one day a kid yelled, 'Man, look at that ugly duck with the long neck and the black mole over it's beak.'. To think I spent years parading around thinking I was a swan.'

'What's happened to all this money?'

"Inside you there are two wolves..."

'After the big race the tortoise and the hare are ordered to provide urine samples."

"I was NOT huffing and puffing - it's just allergies."

Wolf Disguised as a Shepherd (Fables of La Fontaine).

"Never eat a mouse who has medical skills."