Fortune Fighter Gifts

"Sorry son, but I've spent your inheritance fighting inheritance tax."

Rage.

"You must be cheating - no one's that lucky!"

A cow goes to the Fortune Teller - 'I can see two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun...!'

"Prices may keep going up, up, up, but my love for you will remain positively, and forever, as is."

A street fight.

'Don't come too close - this baby will tear you to pieces, bite your head off and drink your blood... I've called him 'Fiscal Policy'.'

End of Affirmative Action

"We don't need no stinkin' unions...I saw it on the internet."

'I can't believe this.. biggest fight of my life, and I forget to pack a wallop.'

'Congratulations! You've just won ten million dollars!'

'It appears Alzedo is toying with his opponent.'

'I think our mission statement should mention scholarship and attendance.'

Stress on GPs

Wrestling Champion.

"He may be Sven the Slayer to you, but to me he's still Mr Cuddly Bun!"

"Bloody cold-callers - I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind. . .!!"

'Soon as your endorphins kick in, you'll feel great.'

'You know that thin person inside you, struggling to get out? -- He seems to have gained weight, too.'

Your Palm

We are an equal opportunities employer - It's true. They pay the same lousy wages to men and women.

"He's a widowed eighty-year-old billionaire with a 'Do Not Resuscitate' tattoo...what's not to like?"

"Our civilisation is consuming too many resources. But we don't make enough money to enjoy it either."

Solar Storm Expected!

Eternal Battle of Man vs Fish

'Activist investors are here to see you and they're wearing boxing gloves.'

"£100 spot fine...er, because we don't like your face."

'He has a real quiet way about him...until the feed runs out.'

'Good news! The stock market is about to explode upwards on . . .'

"The wealth inequality is a good lesson, since a bullish portfolio will make you rich, not happy."

'No more!'

Shadow Punch

Stocks have ruined me....'Poor devil!'

'Careful, that's you're own leg you are breaking.'