Foraging Fan Gifts

"The inflation isn't that bad. The kids pick berries, my wife picks grass and leaves, and once a month we can afford a loaf of bread."

An experimentalist alarms his guests by describing the appearance of the mushrooms in a dish they have just eaten.

"If you could just get rid of the split ends, that will be fine."

Raptures

The discovery of asparagus.

"It was a lot more satisfying before 'catch and release.'"

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

man fishing at a dock sees a billboard: Do You Know It's Anniversary

Yoyo sheep

'Don't bite. They're trolling again.'

'I've no time for these foragers - they come into the area and snap up all the best houses...'

Apparently all our farts damage the ozone layer....

Baby squirrel & Berries

'You wanted to go on a romantic outing. You're on a romantic outing.'

'No, you can't play Space Invaders in it.'

"Never mind the porridge, someone's stolen my woodland mushroom collection."

'Remember to eat your 500,000 a day son!'

'The service is so much better when you dress as royalty.'

"You and your daft inventions."

'Ah, now's there's something different....'

Despite Having Given Up His Veterinary Practice George liked To Keep His Hand In...

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

Angler sees sign that says 'Good Spot'. He says, 'This looks like a good spot.'

'I hope this is catch and release!'

"It's a scientific breakthrough! This seed will produce less corn...thus driving up the price!"

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

Ok, now you're not swiping at salmon. Now you're just splashing me.

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

'There you go again...constantly snagging!'

'It's the cows. They can't get past a cattle guard.'

So? You snort when you laugh, too.

U.S. Farm Production: Cup Runneth Over.

You can always tell animals trained by 4H kids.