Football League Lover Pillows

'I'm a football widow year round now with all the Fantasy Football leagues.'

Punt Cake

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

Bears

A man is trying to play golf with a football boot attached to a stick.

Ball as water-melon.

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

"Now that you've won the Super Bowl what will you do next?"

It had been a while, but he had finally come home.

"Tragic case of having the fridge from the TV when the World Cup is showing."

Egyptian Football

Goalkeeper makes the wrong save.

"Wait! Stop! He changed his mind."

The commentators want to run the officials...

"Awfully quiet... Must be a big game on!"

Various men worshipping a statue of a football

'What makes you think we'll lose today?'

"Of course I love you more than I ove football -- You were my first-round draft pick!"

Baseball Dreams

Football anagram: Curse straw mat (Answer: Marcus Stewart.)

"It was your father's idea - He can't bear to miss a second of the game."

'Okay, who knows how to solve for 'X'?'

Footballers - Henrik Larrson

"So, after five glorious weeks, football is coming home!"

"Edgar isn't here. He's working out with the Dallas Cowboys."

Red State Football

Footballer changes shirt with the ref.

"Vuuuuuuuuuuu!"

Big Football

'Diet? Yeah I'm on a prop's diet...pies,chips,burgers and coke!'

'The centre-forward wins a foul!'

Evolution

'...Do the Hokey-Pokey and turn yourselves around...'

"Somebody has screwed-up the seating arrangements" - Seating is an optical illusion.