Foodie Humorists Pillows

Giant hot dogs.

"Actually, the attraction wasn't freedom from religious persecution but, rather, the all-you-can-eat buffet."

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

ROOMTEMP BURGER

Giant egg.

Octopie: octopus in a pie pan.

'Oh no, it's Captain Kebab.'

'Yes. 'To Go'... please!'

"Sorry Sir, but what exactly were you expecting to be served when you ordered the 'early bird special'."

The Leaning Tower of Pizza

"War is hell and so is this soup."

Lesser known greek gods,

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

The British Territory of the South Sandwich Islands.

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

'I think I'll go home and eat'

'Lining my pockets with aluminum foil so I can sneak Thanksgiving leftovers home.'

A Club Sandwitch.

"Charles didn't like tofu."

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

'I think it's more than a coincidence that I discover fire, and my wife discovers burnt food on the same day.'

Competitive Eating Competition Competitive Vomiting Competition,

Garlic Free Zone.

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

"The salad should be delicious. We ordered it with lots of extra bacon bits."

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

"I'm just the bus boy but I'll be ignoring you also."

'I take it that the birthday cake is for this old trout you just served me?'

Cat eats date.

'Look, I know it's artificial orange, but you're sick, I say, sick.'

"I don't know where to begin, each dish has its own app."