Foodie For Rules Pillows

Skeleton staff. No food to be consumed on these premises.

'Is it organic?'

'Waiter! -- there's a candidate in my soup!'

"I'm taking you off two of the four food groups."

'Waiter, I don't remember ordering this gristle!'

'Are you sure this is a good restaurant, Frank?'

"I was the first one to work completely gluten free."

"Back inside, Bernie! The buffet is full of shrimp, pork and ham!"

'...And when it registers over 140 pounds, it automatically triggers the refrigerator lock.'

"Your dish will be out just as soon as it clears legal."

Cull people who think, because it's organic, they can sell produce that's past its best.

"I'm not quite ready to order. My lawyers are still studying the menu."

"The Attorney's Lunch—may I hear the warranty again?"

'Whatever fast food - fried stuff, fat, sugar, salt for the 'Doesn't Bother Me' person'.

U.S. Bread Basket.

"...and here's some I made earlier..."

"Good evening, my name is Hank. I'm your waiter tonight. This is Eddy, he is our cooks' lawyer."

"All our ingredients are ethically sourced, so feel free to leave the sh*ttiest tip you can possibly imagine."

"The jelly required a soupçon more texture on the custard was on the wrong side of sweet."

"If only the aftertaste came first."

'This food is revolting. And such small portions.'

So su me.

'I found a loophole in my diet rules.'

In the Steinberg fridge, this romance just wasn't meant to be.

'I think I'll just leave a hate tip,'

EU: Legal Labelling Requirements for Meat!

'...Forbidden foods are only allowed when cheating...'

Consumer of Pears.

'Do you have another menu of what I can have?'

"I asked for something gluten-free, dairy-free and meat-free and he brought me a glass of water."

I don't think your heart's in the hospitality game.