Foodie For Laughs Pillows

One Type of Chicken Sandwich has only mayo...the other has only salad and no mayo. Rubbish!

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

'I think I'll go home and eat'

The British Territory of the South Sandwich Islands.

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

'Lining my pockets with aluminum foil so I can sneak Thanksgiving leftovers home.'

'For a small extra charge, we can provide a specially-formulated digestive enzyme.'

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

"I can assure you ladies all our eggs come from free range chickens."

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

'Would you care for some fresh pepper? Well too bad, because all we have is these dried up old peppercorns.'

"I'm just the bus boy but I'll be ignoring you also."

Man says: 'Great pizza, but the mozzarella was a bit stringy.'

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

"I don't know where to begin, each dish has its own app."

F&E Diner. I'll bet you want the alphabet soup, right? Hey! Don't put words in my mouth!

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

Seafood: "Of course our food is fresh."

You are what you eat (Nuts).

'This is gluten free, isn't it?'

"[Old Steak Bone Tavern]"

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

NASA, 'I thought YOU were bringing a can opener!'

Uncle Giving Boy a Mince Pie

'Today's special is yesterday's left-overs.'

"My lord, Sir Arthur is pleased to bid thee welcome to his food court."

"Obviously, sir, it's a very discerning, vegetarian fly."

'The escargots are underdone.'

'In case of fire, don't panic. Pay your bill then leave.'

"They're going to print a retraction - your desserts are not inconsistent."

Ranch Dressing

'I'll have the Chairman-of-the-board Lunch, and Dexter here will have the Sissy's Salad.'

People who steal food out of the fridge at work and then say...

Bagel problems.

'Careful, the plate is really hot.'