Food Safety Manager Pillows

Mash-test Dummies.

would you like it with extra botulism and a touch of salmonella?

Your lobster was off!

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

Kitchen Kapers

Honest Vending

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

HELLth Food Sprouts

"What's happened to Quiche?"

"Please don't kill me."

'Waiter, there's a hairball in my soup, too.'

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

'According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything.'

'I had no idea would be a choice.'

'Don't worry it's organic...'

"What do you have that won't kill me?"

Bottled water straight from the Potomac, Congo and Ganges. Bottled waters that never had much market share.

'Your fingers are in the soup?' - 'Of course they are. It's freezing in that kitchen.'

'Fish has mercury, meat has e-coli, veggies have pesticides, desserts cause obesity...so we'll have the health-concious nothing for dinner' special.'

The FDA studies 'Tobacco'.

"Well, okay I'll eat it. But, only if you have a medical team on stand by."

Toxic Waste Lorry/Toxic Additives Lorry

"The penicillin looks good."

"According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything."

"There's a big green giant at the door!"

"I'm going in."

'They are boneless, I didn't say anything about beaks.'

"Dad, did you know Tia Carmen got a job at my school cafeteria?"

'Ere-we distinctly asked for SAM an' Ella!'

"Our vegan dishes are the same as what cows eat: Nitrates, Pesticides, Ammonia, Antibiotics..."

Restaurant menu board: 'Day old - 2 day old - 3 day old'

"You can't eat that. It has nuts in it."

Frankenfish

A genetically-modified,hydroponically-grown tomato conducts a taste-test of its own.

Genetically Altered Salmon (and other foods) Research