Food Safety Champion Pillows

'Why on Earth would you ask if this turkey is genetically modified?'

would you like it with extra botulism and a touch of salmonella?

Honest Vending

"Please don't kill me."

'Waiter, there's a hairball in my soup, too.'

'It's good to see that you have a smoke detector...'

Daddy showed me why I should always wear my bicycle helmet!

'Don't worry it's organic...'

"What do you have that won't kill me?"

'Fish has mercury, meat has e-coli, veggies have pesticides, desserts cause obesity...so we'll have the health-concious nothing for dinner' special.'

"Well, okay I'll eat it. But, only if you have a medical team on stand by."

The FDA studies 'Tobacco'.

"According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything."

'They are boneless, I didn't say anything about beaks.'

Frankenfish

A genetically-modified,hydroponically-grown tomato conducts a taste-test of its own.

Genetically Altered Salmon (and other foods) Research

"There is nothing dangerous about GM foods!" "Keep talking or we'll smash your head in"

"Uncle Tod's Reviews"

"Is everything all right? Any reactions to the irradiated carrots, the transgenic tomatoes, or the antibiotics in the chicken?"

At first, Moses was worried about the manna from heaven.

"But for an update in GM products in farming we have a spokescarrot."

"We can serve a rare handburger, but because of health regulations, this room will have to be heated to 160 degrees."

Food inspection results

Quick, what's the five-second rule in dog years?

"What do you recommend today?"

Genetically-Modified Foods: Are they safe?

Newspaper headlines - Butters kills, Margarine kills.

"Tonight's specials include beef wellington (long regarded as a major source of cholesterol and saturated fat), Cajun-style swordfish (suspected of containing PCBs and toxic metals), and chicken teriyaki (recent increase in the incidence of salmonella whi

Grim Reaper with ChipsFries.

"Are there any reports of illness at this table?"

"We might be in trouble – the environment people have cited us as a hazardous waste site."

"Aren't you worried you might poison your customers?"

'Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.'

"It says it's 100% ground beef. Only bones, brains, butts and eyeballs. Absolutely no pink slime added..."